Taking chances
I am no relationship expert, but I do know what I have learned, and I think I have learned quite a few.
When relationships ends…
Some makes you obsessive.
Some makes you cry at three in the morning, 4 days after the break up.
Some makes you don’t eat your favorite sandwich, just because it’s his favorite too.
Some unleashes the bad side of you.
Some makes you make every song, your song.
Some makes you hate every couple you see.
And it could go on and on.
It takes time before you realize it’s not the end of the world. And there are more important things to be done.
I have been in those relationships; I have been through sad, hurtful break-ups. And I think that's why, a lot of us, have that post relationship im-so-scared-of-getting-hurt-again syndrome.
But looking back, I think I never had that.
I am no relationship expert, but I do know what I have learned, and I think I have learned quite a few.
When relationships ends…
Some makes you obsessive.
Some makes you cry at three in the morning, 4 days after the break up.
Some makes you don’t eat your favorite sandwich, just because it’s his favorite too.
Some unleashes the bad side of you.
Some makes you make every song, your song.
Some makes you hate every couple you see.
And it could go on and on.
It takes time before you realize it’s not the end of the world. And there are more important things to be done.
I have been in those relationships; I have been through sad, hurtful break-ups. And I think that's why, a lot of us, have that post relationship im-so-scared-of-getting-hurt-again syndrome.
But looking back, I think I never had that.
The scared of getting hurt again part.
I am impulsive most of the time when it comes to matters of the heart.
Because I have always thought that you can never make precautionary measures,
I am impulsive most of the time when it comes to matters of the heart.
Because I have always thought that you can never make precautionary measures,
falling in love is never pain-proof.
That it’s always a gamble.
You will never know, unless you’d be brave enough to know that it will surely hurt.
That’s why; I am so baffled, at why I am so scared now?
I am so scared, I cannot even admit to myself, that yes we are happy, I am very happy, and yes, it is possible to be this happy and at the same time have the most un-perfect relationship.
I am so scared to label our relationship, to label us. To label that this relationship is working out the way it should be and I could see a bit of the future.
I am so afraid to use the word might. Or even hope, because it feels like I’m pre-empting the future. I guess it’s because I have so much belief with fate. So much faith, that I am willing to deprive myself of the happiness the stability of our relationship gives. Just so I won’t be too assured, and later on suffer from the possibility that this might not still be it. Cause is there anyone, in a relationship right now, that wouldn’t want this to be it? And I hate that, that I am so careful about feeling that bliss. That feeling, which who knows I won’t be able to feel again, in this lifetime, with the same person or not.
I guess this one is just so important to me, I don’t want to gamble. I don’t want to take chances, and that I am so careful, that even if I know we are working hard for this relationship to be at its best happy state, I don’t really want to plan ahead. Even if Oprah says we have a good thing going on. It’s best if we take it one day at a time. Be patient and wait.
There’s no doubt that I have a great man with me. Journeying with me, making the most out of what we have and what have we have been through. He is doing his part at his best. He has been with me during the happiest and lowest points of my life, has been understanding and supportive, and most importantly, loves the best and the ugliest parts of me.
I am not scared of getting hurt. I am scared that I might give too much pressure in this relationship, the minute I say, this is it, and it will be doomed. I am so scared, that I will do something that will make this relationship not to be it. But will my being so careful help to prevent anything that may cause the relationship? I don’t think so. That’s why it’s so scary. Because, in the end, it may be not just about the two of you, but what was meant to be.
How does one know if the relationship they are in now is it? They say, you just know. In the middle of all this, I possibly know the answer. And I’m just so chicken to admit it and say it out loud.
What I do know now is what to answer when one day somebody would ask me, what makes Jog special? Jog is special because, he has taught me to know my battles, love with courage and unconditionally. And if only for that, I should worry no more.
That’s why; I am so baffled, at why I am so scared now?
I am so scared, I cannot even admit to myself, that yes we are happy, I am very happy, and yes, it is possible to be this happy and at the same time have the most un-perfect relationship.
I am so scared to label our relationship, to label us. To label that this relationship is working out the way it should be and I could see a bit of the future.
I am so afraid to use the word might. Or even hope, because it feels like I’m pre-empting the future. I guess it’s because I have so much belief with fate. So much faith, that I am willing to deprive myself of the happiness the stability of our relationship gives. Just so I won’t be too assured, and later on suffer from the possibility that this might not still be it. Cause is there anyone, in a relationship right now, that wouldn’t want this to be it? And I hate that, that I am so careful about feeling that bliss. That feeling, which who knows I won’t be able to feel again, in this lifetime, with the same person or not.
I guess this one is just so important to me, I don’t want to gamble. I don’t want to take chances, and that I am so careful, that even if I know we are working hard for this relationship to be at its best happy state, I don’t really want to plan ahead. Even if Oprah says we have a good thing going on. It’s best if we take it one day at a time. Be patient and wait.
There’s no doubt that I have a great man with me. Journeying with me, making the most out of what we have and what have we have been through. He is doing his part at his best. He has been with me during the happiest and lowest points of my life, has been understanding and supportive, and most importantly, loves the best and the ugliest parts of me.
I am not scared of getting hurt. I am scared that I might give too much pressure in this relationship, the minute I say, this is it, and it will be doomed. I am so scared, that I will do something that will make this relationship not to be it. But will my being so careful help to prevent anything that may cause the relationship? I don’t think so. That’s why it’s so scary. Because, in the end, it may be not just about the two of you, but what was meant to be.
How does one know if the relationship they are in now is it? They say, you just know. In the middle of all this, I possibly know the answer. And I’m just so chicken to admit it and say it out loud.
What I do know now is what to answer when one day somebody would ask me, what makes Jog special? Jog is special because, he has taught me to know my battles, love with courage and unconditionally. And if only for that, I should worry no more.
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