die-SEL

i started my OJT last night at INSIDER. when i arrived at 6, they we're still preparing for Patrol, but Ms. Love toured me around the news group dept. She showed me where i would give the sequence guides and script and to whom i must give them. i was really nervous, kasi it's live and there's no room for mistakes. When the sequence guide or the tapes wouldn't be given to the respective person at a specific time I'M DEAD. my career is ova'!

As i wrote yesterday, they we're really nice. (Ms. Love and Mam Beth) Last night i met more of the staff, our Floor D Kuya Rudolf (he's cool), Ate Jake from the Graphics dept (he's hilarious), Ms. Ken PA din (super kulit), and Ms. Karen Davilla (really pretty and nice) and Mr. Erwin Tulfo (bait din and super funny).

Ms. Love also showed me around Studio 7, the control room, the Graphics dept and the TOC. She showed me the long and short cuts. I needed to be familiarized with the workplace kasi, i will be assigned to go all over the place and give them scripts,tapes and sequence guides. and i need all the luck to make it through without fail.

i was in the studio when we went on air, met the cameramen and the anchors. they we're all accomodating. Mr. Erwin Tulfo, (all the cameramen addressed him as Boss) was so funny. Sobra! (the title of this entry is because of what he said) Edmer (another intern, but it was his last day yesterday) was telling me it's fun to watch when they go on air kasi parang sitcom. and he was right.

Edmer was really nice to me. he showed me around and gave me points to remember. he gave me tips which i found very useful and he assured me that it would be fun just as long as i do my work.

Tonet my jowa was assigned to Ek Channel in Production. Actually most of us (from our school) was assigned in Production. Si Gaeity sa MTB, Jeline sa MYX (i wanted to be assigend there, but i'm happy sa news dept), Froi was also assigned sa NCAG (News and Current Affairs Group) but his show assignment was Special Assignment.

I haven't seen Kris, hope later i'll see her. Jericho din- para naman yung WHO DO YOU WANT TO MEET sa friendster ko matupad kahit isa. hehe

later!

karir!

i had my last day of orientation yesterday, and i was assigned in the News and Current Affairs Department of ABS CBN!!!! whooohoooooo! i met our Executive Producer Ms. Beth, and she was nice naman. i was expecting a very mataray EP kasi, and Ms. Love (who i think is the PA of the show) is very accomodating and she wanted me to start today na lang instead of last night. and i forgot to mention pala the show, it's "INSIDER" (yes, naman!)

i'm really excited and i'm expecting a lot of work. sana lang hindi ako mataranta and i would be focused on my work. i hope wala akong boo boo's later.
if there's a downer, but actually not really, i'll be working from 6pm to 12m! and that's QC.. buti na lang my dad offered to be my driver. hehe

at first all i wanted was to get in the internship program of ABS. that meant, any show would do. besides getting into their internship gives you a little edge over those who would apply for work to the station, in the future. but i'm really happy and really LUCKY to be assigned in the "INSIDER".

so there, i'm officially a student trainee of ABS CBN's INSIDER.

and as Ma'am GiGi said in our orientation, " ang ojt dito sa ABS kinakareer!"

sembreak,ojt,alicia keys and tv shows

hi! finals are over! i'm having my sembreak na!

well, before that, at the start of the week (monday) my boyfriend was really galit. as in, he would not answer my calls and would not reply to my texts! as in! it was my fault, and wednesday before my last test, i went all the way to alabang to talk to him and be make peace *hehe* so there, hindi niya ako matiis (yabang! ok na kasi kami) we're ok na!

KAPAMILYA

for my friends who know me very well, they know how much i wanted to have my internship in ABS.
lucky me, i'm having my orientation on tuesday and wednesday. so happy! pero my god ang transportation ko!!! 30 papunta and almost 40 pauwi!! hay naku! welcome quezon city talaga!

ALICIA KEYS

"If I Ain't Got You" A. Keys

Some people live for the fortune

Some people live just for the fame

Some people live for the power yeah

Some people live just to play the game

Some people think that the physical things

Define what's within

I've been there before

But that life's a bore

So full of the superficial

Some people want it all

But I don't want nothing at all

If it ain't you baby

If I ain't got you baby

Some people want diamond rings

Some just want everything

But everything means nothing

If I ain't got you

Some people search for a fountain

Promises forever young

Some people need three dozen roses

And that's the only way to prove you love them

And in a world on a silver platter

And wondering what it means

No one to share, no one who truly cares for me

Some people want it all

But I don't want nothing at all

If it ain't you baby

If I ain't got you baby

Some people want diamond rings

Some just want everything

But everything means nothing

If I ain't got you

Some people want it all

But I don't want nothing at all

If it ain't you baby

If I ain't got you baby

Some people want diamond rings

Some just want everything

But everything means nothing

If I ain't got you

If I ain't got you with me baby

Nothing in this whole wide world don't mean a thing

If I ain't got you with me baby

oh well, i'll miss the alicia keys concert tommorow. i don't have money to buy tickets eh!
i tried winning the tickets in tv shows, who i can't believe gives away ticket just like that.

i'll just sing if i aint got you in my cd player na lang..

it would be so nice if jog and i could watch it. haaay! that's kinda our song...

not connected

our two phone lines we're disconnected for 3 days. and it was like i can't do anything without the phone...crazy i know but that's how i felt. there was no internet of course kaya sobrang booring!!!!!

one tree hill and the O.C

i was talking to gian last night, and i told her that even if a lot of people and i read everywhere that i should watch these shows, when i finally had time and watched it, i've realized i'm OLD. i know, that OA coz i'm only 21, but one tree hill is like, about highschool and O.C. is very much like dawson's creek in college and with a lot of money. i'm sorry for those who enjoy watching it, im not saying it's not good, it's just that, i feel it's not for me anymore.

i mean, even if i think chad michael murray is cute, even if i feel i have to see him every tuesday,i don't think i could spend an hour watching his show and just look at him and say "it's ok, he's cute naman eh"

speakin of tv shows, last night i was able to catch Simple Life 2, and although i know it's annoying how bratty and kind of self centered they are i enjoy watching it. sorry.

breast cancer awareness month

as i was blog hopping and reading one of my fav blogs, Ala posted that it's breast cancer awareness month this october. so there, i'm just trying to spread the word!

i watched Rio Diaz lifestory on Maalala mo kaya last night, and i just could not help but cry and admire her strength and faith. she's amazing and a real inspiration not only to cancer patients but also to us who are so blessed to be healthy and alive.

fully booked

i was lost. it's my first time to check out fully booked, coz everytime i go to rockwell, i'm with someone and kahiya naman if i'll drag them in, cause i know i'll take my time around the store, and i was right.

as in! the books i want to read are all there...

• the queer eye for the straight guy book
• five people you meet in heaven
• shopaholic series
• gossip girl (i know! i'm too old for that)
• about a boy
• satc
• the notebook
• bridget jones:the edge of reasoning (the movie will come out this november, and i don't think i can read the book before it's shown) **a little trivia, bridget jones and i have the same birthday!!!that's my claim to fame!hahaha
• COOKBOOKS -Nigella Lawson, Bobby Flay (crush ko kasi sya), Ming Tsai, Sara Moulton
• Kevin Aucoin make up book
• Manolo Blahnik!!!!!!!!!

as in sobra! i was lost and i loved it!

their paperback five people you meet in heaven is only 278..unlike sa national. eh kanina, i don't want to spend my money, kasi i'm actually saving it for something...so there, babalikan ko na lang.

anyways, i bought my lip and cheek tint na sa mimi's. hay salamat!i could sleep well na! hehehe

my bestfriend gian asked me about blogging, i hope she starts soon, para kahit papano, kahit pilit may magbabasa ng blogs ko!!!!! hehehe

later!

coming home

my dear boyfriend arrived lunch time today!

i had a day full of agenda, but when he texted when i was finishing my spagetti at Mc Do, i knew i had to cancel.

TO DO LIST:

- take make up quiz, who cares! finals na next week! who is she kidding?

-pass my e.p readings, i can do that tommorow.

-have chest x-ray, a reuqirement for ABS-CBN OJT (yes, they called,we just have to complete our requirements by tuesday next week!) i'll do it tommorow na lang.

-pass my script, i asked my friends to pass it for me, what are friends for?

those are the things i missed just to see my boyfriend! it was all worth it!!!!

he was tanned! gwapo!!!

we had early dinner at our favorite carinderia, and he had a lot of pasalubong, mostly food for my family, i got a coin purse and thats it. ah, barquillos pala! but Princess, ate half of it.

i'm really happy he's back home, hope he can rest well tonight and tom, kasi wala naman siya class.

last night, i'm officially a crazy girl. i finished my script at 3 a.m. i was dead tired, had back pains na. when i climbed myself to bed, got my cell, i thought of texting him, to say i just finished and i'm about to sleep. then while i was composing the message, and super tired, that's when i felt I MISS HIM and cried! i was used to talking to him after a hell day, before sleeping and last night i was dead tired and nobody's giving me the comfort he gives, even without me asking for it.

yah, i cried, only later to realize he's coming home today, and i only have to wait for hours na lang. imagine, i managed to be ok, calm, and kept myself busy since the day he left. i didn't cry, sometimes it hits me that he's malayo and all but i didn't cry. kagabi lang. weird!

so there, i'm really happy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

later!

katam

i'm doing laundry as of this writing, jog called while i tonet and i we're window shopping, listing all the things we want for christmas and we will buy for christmas.

kasi, since july, we save P40 everyday including sundays, on december we are expecting to have 6k!!!so there, mayabang kami mag window shop.

im supposed to do my project, a script for my playwriting class. a final requirement for the subject, but i'm realy "tamad". umiral na naman Katam ko.hehe

instead im blog hopping, reading about other people's lives and making my own blog, blog-tiful. :D

there's this song on my mind...yung "all i want for christmas..." the song from love actually.

speaking of songs, i'm looking for Beyonce's album, dangerously in love, i'm planning to burn it and give my dear boyfriend a copy coz he's in love with beyonce..who wouldnt be?even i sometimes' caught by her hips swaying, bootylicious body! things you do for your significant other!

i also got the latest issue of 17 mag, Lindsay Lohan's on the cover! my mean girl!

just browsed through it on the way home, later ko na lng basahin, since i bought a light bulb na din for my desk...

finals are coming up next week..arrgh! still so tamad. hope ABS CBN calls na for our OJT or else we're screwed! baka RPN na lng kami, since most of our classmates are having their TV OJT there.

i'm playing neopets again.i'm trying to get a job and make my pet productive naman.

i'm out of words.

later,

WHAT I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS part 1

i know it's very materialistic, forgive me...
just giving in to my human needs...
besides it's just a wish list...

1. Pumps from Janylin


2. BOOKS
Tuesdays with Morrie
5 people you meet in heaven
Memoirs of a Geisha
Da Vinci Code
The Edge of Reasoning: Bridget JOnes 2
Shopaholic Series


3. BAGS
i know i have plenty, but i'd like some more (BAD!)
MNG


4. SATC
i know, it ended na, but can i just have one last hirit?


just part 1...who knows how many would be the next

l8r!

blah blah blah

The Word of the Day for September 27 is:

realia \ree-AL-ee-uh\ noun : objects or activities used to relate classroom teaching to the real life especially of peoples studied

Example sentence: The teacher asked the exchange student from Brazil to bring in photos, food items, and other realia to share with the class.

single for the moment

it's the second day of being "single" and besides the i have all the time, i miss my beau...

he called when they arrived in Bacolod, he was asking what i want for pasalubong, i kept sayng i just want him to come home safely and soon, just as i finish saying that, he sssssssshhhhh me, insisting i should tell him what i want to have.

even if he's away, he's still the sweetest bf a girl could ever have. like last night, at 10:30pm i was miraculously sleepy, then he texted and asked what i was doing and if im getting ready for bed. and so even if i was so sleepy, i replied then rembered i still have to do a script due on friday. then i passed out. the next thing i knew, i was awaken by his "missed call" and then i knew it was signal to call him, kaya lang, bigla nag-out of coverage area ang secretary niya, then i textd na lng, and he said he just wanted to say goodnight and he'd call na lng tom kasi badtri signal dun.

Jewelries

I went to our library kanina, i had to do one of the requirements before graduating, blah blah, so i want there. if there's one thing i like about our Library's Periodical Section, is that they have decent magazines like People Asia and MEGA. Everyone knows i love Magazines and so, this was the best time to catch up with MEGA Mag since i don't buy them regulary.

Lucy Torres-Gomez (who i admire so much, not only because he's married to my ultimate crush, but also because she's a devoted mother, a perfect definition of Beauty and Brains) was on front cover of MEGA's September issue. In her interview she mentioned how she grew up in Ormoc, and even as a child she adored jewelries. Jewelries that defined moments and has sentimental value. like a i-love-you ring given by her husband, heirloom engagement rings, 18th bday pendant, thanks-for-giving-me-a-child earrings.

i personally like heirlooms, at 21, this early my mom already gave me a cross pendant with rice pearls embedded on it, and 2 black pearls which could still be made into a pair of earrings or maybe a set. (we asked in Makati, how much it would cost and it's too pricey) i also still have my first necklace, although the pendant with the letter "K", but my sister lost it when it was her time to use it. (both our first names start with letter K)

and now that i'm thinking that it's really nice to pass on jewelry not only for its monetary value but more so for their sentimental value.and right now im doing a mental inventory of all the earrings and rings my mom lets us wear ....

one week vacation

hey!

my bf's leaving. actually he left this morning, he's going to bacolod, originally the plan was only for a week,then this morning he called saying it will be for a week. nyahayay!

he jokes and says: "pakabait ka ha, at enjoy ka sa 1 week na bakasyon mo!"

so here i am, alone, heehe. O.A. nman noh!

MOVIES!!

i watched the Terminal and Feng Shui. the terminal was kinda long pero its ok naman kasi it was not boring kaya lng ang tagal lng talaga. then, Feng Shui, it was the first time i screamed that hard! i mean tili to death talaga. Kris' acting was good in fairness and besides i like her. but compared to her acting in Hiram, its much better.

ex boyfriend

my ex bf marvin called last thursday, when i answered the phone and knew it was him, i felt i should talk to him, after all these months of not avoiding his calls, texts and emails.

when we broke up, marvin and i were friends, i got over him almost a year after we broke up pa. partly because i knew it was my fault i lost him and because of the hinayang factor because my mom adores him.

after him, jai came, marvin wanted to come back. at some point i was really annoyed with him kasi he was very persistent to the point that i felt he was disrespectful of jai and our relationship, that was the time i felt i can no longer be friends with him.

then now that im with jog, earlier this year, he did the same thing. super kulit, there was this time my bf read his txt, and with that i knew i can never be friends with him.ever.

but when he called last thursday,he was asking how i was and said "Kaye, may gf na ako" honestly i felt relieved more than anything. Kasi naman he's a good man, a great catch, and he deserves to be happy more than anyone.

i told him, i was irita during the rime that he kept on calling,text pa ng text and he apologized and he said he understands.

so there, our friendship is restored.

later!

have to cook dinner pa!

my boyfriend's new love

Last Friday, I got my Mango gift pack at Robinson’s Galleria with my boyfriend. (I won the Cosmopolitan MNG raffle contest) The package included their first signature fragrance, Mango (cut for a woman),Eau de Toilette 150 ml, lotion, and deo spray. It also included a shirt, with MNG logo. It made me giddy and made all the effort worth it.

Another reason why I was able to drag Jog all the way to Pasig was because he was also looking for new shoes.

This is the first time that I had a boyfriend as conscious as Jog is. (I don’t want to say vain!) He’s a metrosexual! He’s very particular with his clothes, his skin, his feet, and gladly we share the love for SHOES!

Just like any other girl, (haha! I’m comparing my bf to a girl!) we’ve been looking for that “perfect pair” for the past 2 weeks, we’ve gone from every mall, South Mall, Festival, Rob.Place Manila,Glorietta and lastly Rob Galleria.
And finally, we’ve found it! SALE pa!

It was brown, just the color we both wanted, and its name it TOBY. Cute noh! And when we were about to pay for it, as we were checking for damages…there it was some white mark on the left pair. He was heart broken. The sales lady was kind enough to tell us na, we could check out their outlet at Robinson’s Place Manila. And that kinda relieved us, kasi nman its near my school, I could check it out and buy it for him.

And so, right after my EP, I went straight to the mall together with tonet, hoping they have the design and a size 8 for moi boyfriend.

And as I was approaching Hush Puppies, nakita ko na! I immediately asked for a sized 8 the man who assisted us asked “Saan po yung magsusuot?” I answered, “ah wala eh, pero nasukat na naming yan sa Galleria, may damage lng kasi yan dun eh.”

I went home with his new shoes.

Today, he went here sa house and wore them. He kept on jumping! kasi nga daw light weight ung Hush Puppies. we took pictures pa! di ko ma-post kasi di ko pa upload from the cell. tom, or maybe later.

life check

Friday
September 3,2004

The Notebook

It’s one of my favorite novels by Nicholas Sparks. And I love the movie.

I watched it with Jog in SM Southmall, sabi pa nga nya, we should have watched it sa Alabang Town or Glorietta and spent 100+ pesos kasi the movie was worth it.

I cried when I read the book and as expected I cried watching it. Jog kept showing me his goose bumps when Noah said “it’s not yet over” and when Allie said “do you think that our love can make miracles?” super kinalibutan si Jog.

After the movie, he asked me if it was just like in the book, and we both kept saying their love is unbelievably true.

I’m glad he enjoyed and liked the movie. The last movie we saw kasi, nung Monday lang. Princess Diaries, he was bored. So buti nakabawi ako.

If you guys haven’t watched the movie, you wouldn’t regret watching it.

Monday
September 6, 2004

Tell me what I don’t like Mondays…

Oh well, during my 10 a.m. class our teacher we’re bursting with fruit flavor! Actually it was the opposite. Super galit talaga siya to the whole class. Kasi last Saturday, we used the broadcast studio and naiwan yung aircon na bukas for 2 days!!! Kanina lng na discover.

Sino naiwan nahuli sa studio? One of them was I. Tonet and Larcy were the ones who switched off the lights and well, they left the aircon. Kasi nman hindi nila alam mag patay noh and hindi nila alam na bukas pa because the lights we’re off na! Not that I’m siding with them, (of course I am) kaya lng meron nman kasi talagang naka-assign to do that, so it was not their responsibility/our responsibility.

Our president is a friend of ours (Froilan), pero kanina umaga, when our teacher was blaming my 2 friends larcy and tonet, I had to say something.

I felt it was Froilan’s responsibility being the president and having called that meeting. And he was actually not claiming any responsibility for what happened. He kept on looking for others to blame, when in fact dapat siya ang umako ng responsibilidad and in the first place adjourned the meeting and left the studio with us. Kasi hindi pa daw tpos yung meeting, but he left and so everybody thought tapos na. No officers we’re residing the meeting, nung umalis nga kami, nagulat pa kami na aalis na at kami na lng pala tao.

Well anyways, tonet and larcy talked to our teacher na, who is still very mad at all of us.

I made cheesecakes today! I have orders kasi sa office nila mama.

And while making those, I saw Bamboo sa Ok fine Whatever! He’s really cute, pero he’s losing weight. And he has nice legs; I saw it last week when Pipol featured rock bands.

And Star Movies were airing one of my favorite movies…Reality Bites. And because of that movie, my ideal guy was like Troy Dyer. (Ethan Hawke’s character)

Here are just few of my favorite lines from the movie:

Lelaina: I mean, these job interviews, Troy... The word “vivesection” a staggering understatement. I mean, can you define irony?
Troy:: Its when the actual meaning is the complete opposite from the literal meaning.
Lelaina: My God, where were you when I needed you today?

Lelaina: Troy, aren't you excited?
Troy: I'm bursting with fruit flavor.

Michael: Have I stepped over some line in the sands of coolness with you, because excuse me if somebody doesn't know the secret handshake with you.

Troy: There's no secret handshake. There's an IQ prerequisite, but there's no secret handshake.

Troy: Did he dazzle you with his extensive knowledge of mineral water or was it his in-depth analysis of Marky Mark that finally reeled you in? I just would have liked to have been there to watch how you rationalized sleeping with a yuppie-head cheeseball on the first date.
Lelaina: He's not a yuppie.
Troy: He's the reason why Cliff's Notes were invented.

Lelaina:: Why are you acting like a jealous boyfriend all of a sudden?
Troy:: I... am not acting like anything. I am calmly reading.

Troy: There's no point to any of this. It's all just a... a random lottery of meaningless tragedy and a series of near escapes. So I take pleasure in the details. You know... a quarter-pounder with cheese, those are good, the sky about ten minutes before it starts to rain, the moment where your laughter becomes a cackle... and I sit back and I smoke my Camel Straights and I ride my own melt.

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy

Well, watched their episode last night. The guy was a great ice skater. He’s married; his wife is also an ice skater and is Italian. They look so beautiful together!

The guy’s clothing make over we’re all Armani, he was taught how to make raviolis, and you could really see he’s gladly doing this for his wife and that they really love each other.

After enjoying the show, I called up the boyfriend and wanted to tell him that I love him, but I couldn’t… nahihiya ako…ngayon pa!

But before we hanged up, I managed to say I love you, without sounding so cheesy and clingy and annoying. And I thought he liked it.

Ah! Love…

say more with pictures!

ha!

i can post pictures na!!!!!!! well, thanks saab!!!

i'm posting, this pic kasi resize ko..gigantic naman pala kasi pag di mu resize so...

here's my jowa, tonet


tonet's my classmate, been friends for 2 years na, she knows all about me,we share the love for tofu, and we both dislike spicy foods! i know i can depend on her, she's a great friend,sister,daughter,person lahat!
i love her!before we call each other sosi friend and now jowa

and mah bowfriend, jog


my bestfriend,mah bowfriend, the man i could be crazy with, i fight and make up with, the man who have treated me with great respect, and who have love me inspite and despite of

jen, my pangga and jog's siter


its because of her that jog and i are together...hehe
we became close late last school year, it was her last year kc she was graduating.
it was our closeness and sleep overs that introduced jog and i to each other.
she was supportive though hindi sya naging konsintidora..
she's also very close to my family, and i consider her family..
we we're worried at first na baka maapektuhan kami because of our (jog and i) relationship, but i really try not to involve her for our friendships' sake.

NINA's BACK!

that's me,jen,anne and niña


me, jen, anne, niña


niña,me and jen
dati it was jen na long hair ngayon kami naman ni niña!


niña,anne and me

nina my highschool friend came back from the states last monday, it was only last saturday that we got the chance to see each other again after 2 years na..

the night started and ended with kwentuhans, about our other batchmates, and i was surprised to know a lot, i mean A LOT are momies now...oh well.

we felt very SATCish kasi we we're in starbucks and it was only the four of us...
ayun..

i showed my sis our pics kanina morning and she said "matatanda na kayo!"

hay!

P.S.
i'm trying to post pics, hope its a success!

SATC

Sex and the City: bye

finished the 6th and final season of sex and the city last sunday.wasn't able to write about it kasi nawala sa isip ko..hehe. i cried over (for the first time for SATC) the ick factor and the american girl in Paris part 2..it was swell.. its sad na its over pero they ended it well naman, so ok na din..

jog, who catches the 6th season over their WOWOW channel, agrees with me na super gwapo ni Smith, Samantha's new boyfriend! he's super sexy and he shaved his head... (i like kalbos eh)

jason lewis (kalbo)

jason lewis (satc)



and i like harry, charlotte's really lucky to have him.

i'm really careful about writing about it kasi don't want to ruin the excitement for those who haven't watched it..

and Miranda's like the jealous friend we have, or we ourselves are..in a good way though.

Berger reminded me of my ex boyfriend, (he writes well too-my ex) i wondered tuloy if all writers are like that..hehe

and Carrie everybody's favorite wore the best outfits and the i-wish-i-have-that shoes!
she deserved only the best...even the best man for for her.

TIVO- Miranda has it, Oprah has it...hope magkaron na din dito PINAS!!

CINDERELLA STORY

i passed by Robinson's Place Manila (as i always do) and checked out if it's still shown, well..hindi na!Jog and i we're planning to watch it pa naman sana on Friday..tsk tsk tsk..

i love lizzie maguire,( i mean hillary duff) and super cutie pie si Chad Murray! Dawson Creek days pa..kaya sana we'll be able to catch it.

HTML

hay naku, still learning and researching about it...
hirap tlga.
kaya tignan nyo yung link ko, hindi maganda!hmp!
but i'll read more about it..

BEING A STUDENT

well.kanina lng ako nag research finally, for our project due next tues..cramming is the best policy..hehe

and kanina while waiting for jen,realized na dami ko pa defeciences and i'm graduating!
i have to complete my Nat Sci 2 subject and hopefully my PE 4! or else mag swimming ako next sem!nyaiks!!!!
sana matapos ko sya...

and there's this EP thing pa na kailangan complete or else hindi din me graduate!
arrrrrgggggghhh!


thanks to ala and bianca! they allowed me to link them..sana si saab reply na din..

UCC coffee

ate out tonight with my mom and dad. feeling only child!hehehe

we ate at UCC coffee at Valero st. Makati.

i had their seafood salad, and had their banana chocolate smoothie! it was delightful!
i've been having a chocolate and ice cream craving...maybe its becuase im not eatin rice for a month now.im on a diet, and i've lost weight, 10 pounds already and im very happy to fit in most of my clothes now!

gtg, im learning html..hehe

too much that i can't handle

well, jog and i talked last night.
actually, it was midnight so, early this morning.
after what felt like 3 weeks of not talking, (we both say that) we're really crazy.

we didn't really talked about it.
i just told him what happend to me and my whole day,
we talked about SATC's last season, and how much i love smith,how i cried over a few episodes for the first time, and how my midterms were.

he actually told me some things that i should remember,it helped a little but at the back of my mind, i still have doubts.

i know we love each other,but i'm not sure if we are ready for the consequences of loving each other and how we can show each other that we mean it when we say "i love you". i'm not sure if i can be as bold as i was before and take that leap, even if i know that in the end it will hurt.

i just feel lost in love.

it seems that no matter how much he would explain, and how much i believe him, i couldn't gamble anymore (as i used to,in matter of the heart). i'm getting old.

and here i am, trying to figure out what i should do.
i think i've been here before and i think he shouldnt make me go through this again..

to be happy and be a martyr or to be alone and alone

in a rut

it's midterms week, im in my last exam tomorrow.
and there's nothing i'm looking forward to this week..
last week i had, because jog and i had plans..
but now, i don't know...

we argued about the same things all over again last night.
partly my fault, because we've talked about this a million times already, agreed upon a solution but still i can't seem to understand.

i just can't accept the fact that the best reason he could give me is "sorry, i can't"
and even if we say we're in a relationship, that we are happy, it could only take one phone call, a text or a chat that could ruin it all.

i love him. very much. but even if i say this to myself over and over and over again, it still doesn't make a difference on how i feel or think...

Pangga (jen, his sister who's also my closest friend) said it best...
"there are a million and 1 reason why you should not continue on this battle but it there's one reason why you should...its because you love him.."

and it hurts big time!
we agreed not to talk, until i've made up my mind. i don't know if i could live with that...
i'm so used to talking to him all the time...(very dependent i know)

it hurts that we're like this now, that we could be the sweetest looking couple then the not-talking-for-a-week couple the next..

we're happy,i'm happy,i love him,he loves me, and i cant believe we're messed up because of that tiny detail!

and for the first time in the history of my relationships i don't blame it on him..i mean i dont put all the blame on the guy...

i'm just hoping for the best..

this shall all past......

renewal of vows....

we got it from dino guevarra and kim delos santos on 30 days, actually it was jog's idea.kasi sya naman nakapanood.

for the week of july 19-24 we were always fighting on the phone. i dont know if i was PMS-ing, basta we would always sleep na masama loob. reasons would be because he said something that i didn't like, or he says a joke and mapipikon ako.like that, and it was tiring. the only good thing (also bad actually) is we would patch up agad,like the next day and we wouldn't talk about it na lng, we say sorry but we dont discuss it na lng.

and so friday comes and my then si jai my ex gave me this cd, sympre naman any bf wouldnt be happy. mejo tampo pala sya when i was singing one of the songs in the cd, yung kay carole king, you're so far away...

saturday
since wednesday,when i recieved a text message from my friend ate jp who invited me to our friend jp's bday on saturday,(another jp) i've been planning not to go,but then i got a call from the celebrator himself (who's a very good friend,and considers me a woman after his heart) i changed plans.

the plan of going on his birthday..i didn't inform jog pala...that night, he called and was really mad..

jog: alis ka na?
kaye: hindi mamaya pa
jog: ah tlga, kanino ka nagpaalam?
kaye: (silence) (takot me) ah, (stutter) di ba sinabi ko na sayo
jog: (interrupts) wala kang sinabi sa kain na tutuloy ka
kaye: kwento ko na sayo di ba na nagusap kami...
jog:oo pero ang sabi mu ayaw mo pumunta at makipag plastikan sa kanila
kaye: oo nga pero nung tumawag si jp di ba naawa naman ako...
jog: bahala ka..sige na magbabasketball ako,wala ako dala cell

and so,officially he was mad.

it was raining hard, and i have'nt finished doing the laundry, so i got into thinking...
sa totoo, takot talaga ako kay jog, specially when i talked to pangga,his sister jen, and she told me, jog was really mad and asked her kung nagsabi ako sa kanya (kay jen) even their mom said " ay naku ging,sabihan mu si kikay,alam mu naman yang si jog sawain"

i got my phone, texted ate jp, made up and excuse that my parents didn't allow me to go becuase of the rain. and i knew jp would understand. besides, anu ba naman yung si jen and tonet na lng friend ko,basta ma bf!" hehehe

when he got home from basketball, i called and told him i stayed home.
JOG: mabuti naman.

and then that night they had to leave because their uncle died.they had to go to bulacan.

i was hoping that night, its over.the fight.

MONDAY

He told me he was really pikon last saturday, and he really wanted to ask me kung gusto ko pa tuloy relationship namin, because we were fighting the whole week, with really babaw things.

he also said he felt bad, because i was singing the song jai gave me last friday..

and so monday we kissed and made up

and wednesday he gave me flowers..

kaya when we talked on the phone, i told him..renewal of vows week ba?
and kasi we were planning to watch pa catwoman (which is a very lousy movie) on thursday pa...and that's how the title began..hehe

we're really crazzy!

NOTE:
Actually, this all happend before "MY FIRST FLOWER".
i didnt have internet account at that time kaya, ayun...now ko lng na post.hehe

MY FIRST FLOWER

i remember having this converstion with my good friend Larcy, during our boyfriend-less days,well it still is for Larcy (hehe) she asked me if anyone from my ex's gave me flowers?

and then i looked back from bf #1,bf #2..."wala pa" i followed it up by "eh kasi naman, i don't like flowers, i mean of course they are nice pero, if it will be given by my boyfriend or a suitor, i wouldn't appreciate it..para kasing feeling ko tamad na sya to think of something to give me,its very usual na for a guy to give flowers..mas ma-appreciate ko pa pag food!" That was 2 years ago..

well, i've been very careful and afraid to say how i really feel with my relationship with jog..i mean when other people ask or sometimes even to myself, i don't assess our relationship as too good nor too bad..with my past relationships, and i guess everyone could relate, you would like to think that that relationship you're in presently will be " it ". and now that i'm into one again, looking through my history of past relationships, i've had 2 false alarms already, the first one was the guy my mom loves and the second with the so brilliant guy, i'm so afraid to even hope that this is it..whenever it crosses my mind, imediately want to erase it!

but i guess denying myself with the truth doesnt help either..

jog has been amazing all these time (i didn't an use exact time frame,because we're cray and we don't have an official "date/monthsary/anniversary) he's been all that and more, i see his efforts in making my family like him,he's been good to my friends (esp. tonet my jowa), he makes time for me, for us, he says sorry when he feels its his fault, he still says sorry even if its my mistake,he's very patient with me, he puts up with my craziness and although he seldom says " i love you " amazingly i can feel that he does..he shows me..so, officially today, i'm wishing (cause i dont think hoping works anymore) that this, our relationship will come far.
so anyways,back to the title of my blog..

i was out with my very good friend JP,we had lunch, coffee, long chats, and ice cream! (cause i just had my braces adjusted and it hurts like hell) earlier that morning while having our usual good morning talk on the phone, he asked what time i'll be finished with my "chismisan" with JP, i said, i'll behome by 230. then he said that he'll be driving for his father and he might drop by later..of course i said "sure, just text me when you're on your way na"

and so, at 430 my phone vibrated and read "nsan ka n? ppnta na kme jan!" i told JP we have to go na,coz the bf is dropping by the house. i hurriedly took the fx ride, then he again txtd "dto na kmi!tsk! wala pa tao sa bhay nyo!" i replied "w8 lng,hi way na me, sbi k kc txt me pag ppunta na kau"
i saw their car parked, saw his cute nephew Sir Wendrick, and his dad. when i walked toward them, i called Sir Wendrick and asked for a kiss, then i apologized and then asked Sir his favorite pasalubong from me.."Sir, gusto mu ba ng Moo?" Pa-good boy answer "Opo!" then i took his hand and then we walked towards our gate, and just as we were near our house, Sir called out "Pangga!Pangga!B-lak,B-laklak galing Jog" and there..i saw in our plant box, long stemmed Stargazers! i could feel my smile reached my ears...

its the first time ive recieved flowers from a guy..from my bf..and according to jog its his first time giving a girl flowers..wow first timers!hehehe
its such a wonderful,crazy feeling.
actually, babaeng babae feeling ko, im officially a lady..
and everyday i take pictures of it like it was surveyed..
i miss blogging!wala kasi internet, and sobrang kuripot me to buy for myself. too much saving!hehehe
i missed reading saab, ala, and bianca's blog tuloy!
anyway, catched up ion them na.

im back?!

i'm back.and this is for good.i hope.post again tomorrow.